A Christmas Parade & Some Horses

This past weekend somehow felt like we had all the time in the world with nothing to do – so we took full  advantage and filled it up with LOTS of fun Christmas happenings.  First, we pushed up Saturday ChickFilA breakfast so we could be downtown at 10 to see the Christmas parade.  William had a ball.  We got there early, and it turns out that was a little unnecessary, but we got a good spot on Broadway and William had a good time just running around waiting for the floats.  Sam had to go back to get his jacket because it was surprisingly windy and Patrick slept through nearly the whole thing in the Moby wrap.  

They were handing out mini flags at the beginning of the parade and William thought they were the coolest things ever.  And there isn’t much cuter than a mini-person waving a mini-flag.  Just saying.  He had such a good time and was even getting good at telling the people driving by “Merry Christmas”.  Of course, his favorites were the many firetrucks and trains that passed by.  A couple of the floats were throwing out “treats” and William was all about that.  He had lots of tootsie rolls stuffed into his and Sam’s pockets by the time we left.  I was surprised at how long of a parade it was.  We had to leave at 11:00/15 so I could get home, feed the baby, and go to the hospital to volunteer by noon – and it didn’t appear that they were even close to being done!

He did so good though.  Holding our hand in the road, not stepping off the curb, and being just generally a sweet wonderful little boy.  No tantrums in public.  It was great.  By the time we got home and I picked him up out of the carseat, he was exhausted (from waking up entirely too early) and had his head on my shoulder.  So straight to nap he went.  Poor kid.  It must’ve been a lot to take in…and he ran in circles for about 20 minutes leading up to the parade!

At 3:00 we went to The Landings to see the Budweiser Clydesdales!!!  I have never seen them before, even though they come every year, and I guess we couldn’t make it last year… who knows.  But off we go…….. to circle the parking lot with the rest of Columbus for twenty minutes before finding a spot.  Turns out the horses were a little late, and it takes an hour to get them hooked all up – no worries.  William ran up and down the sidewalk and Sam took him into Mainstreet Toys.  Pretty sure the kid was in hog heaven.  I fed the baby – which was interesting with the wind – thank goodness he only wanted a snack –haha!!!  

Around 4:15, the horses began trolloping around.  They are really cool, beautiful, humongous animals.  William loved it – we stayed and waited for them to come past us three or four times.  “Horsey come back?”  So cute.  We told him we were going to go see horses, and he immediately said “Shake?” – which is one of my parent’s horses.  Crazy how he remembers that!!  And he now will go “Neigh” (instead of “moo”) when you ask him what does a horsey say?  So cute.  (he was really obsessed with cows for a couple months…)

The next morning, I think Patrick and I slept in a little (still up before 7) and William & Sam are watching The Polar Express.  I guess Sam had DVR’d it and William was enthralled.  I had never seen the movie, and didn’t really remember the book, so it was fun to have a family moment watching the movie.  Even if Sam was falling asleep… he had an early morning again. ;) love you babe!  

We went to church, did a Christmas craft and had a generally wonderful rest of the day.  I heart my boys.  

Oh - before I forget. We were all, Patrick too, in the boys' room putting William to bed.  Sam sang him Jesus Loves Me, we said our night night prayer, and we all gave him kisses and hugs goodnight.  Then, he grabs Sam's hand, pulls it to his face, and says "Don't go Daddy.  Stay here".  Sweetest thing I've ever seen.  I'm pretty sure Sam melted.  So, I'm going to try and remember that moment when he is being VERY two.  My sweet boy.

And William decided that he COULD indeed say his name tonight!!!!!  He has been saying "me" or "name" when we ask him what his name is - but he apparently decided that today that was no longer good enough and will say his name.  We are so proud.  :)

Loves!

It's beginning to look like Christmas

We are in full Christmas swing at our house.  Well – we have the tree up, three wreathes, the toy soldier on the back of the door, an ornament spoon holder, and a couple Christmas pillows floating around.  We didn’t go crazy – there were a lot of things that didn’t make the cut because little curious hands would destroy them – but the house is very “Merry Christmas!”  This year I managed to wrangle my husband into agreeing that perhaps the money spent on a Christmas tree would be put to better use getting the boys something for Christmas – or paying bills and putting food on the table.  Not sure how I succeeded, but it just so happened that my Daddy had an extra artificial tree that he could let us borrow, and he was coming to Columbus anyhow to take us to Fantasy in Lights.  Perfection.  $40 saved.  Thank goodness.

Fantasy in Lights was so much fun.  And a big shout to my super awesome employer, TSYS, who always works out a deal with Callaway allowing us to purchase super discounted tickets.  Love it.  We headed out literally as soon as I pulled up in the driveway and made it to the line around 6:30-6:45ish..?  It was perfectly dark.  William sat in front with Mima and told us all about everything he saw.  Then he switched and “drove” the van with Grandaddy and Hilbert helped steer.  He loved going under the light “tunnels”.  My favorite is the part with all the twinkle lights that just hang down from the trees.  No animation – just pretty white lights.  I’m easy to please.  And I swear Patrick even watched and enjoyed the lights.  It was a wonderful evening and I can’t wait to repeat it every year with the boys.  It can only get more fun.

Patrick has decided that excessive drooling is much more fun than spitting up.  Though, he still spits up frequently enough to create massive loads of laundry…  He sucks on his, gets the saliva really flowing, and then lets it dribble out of his mouth and onto his entire outfit.  A couple times we have been playing, I hold him up to fly, and then I get a whole bunch of drool dropped onto my face.  It’s awesome.  But if he’s teething – he’s not upset about it – though he does LOVE to have his gums rubbed.  Sam discovered that the other day.  If he was a cat – he would’ve purred.

He’s been practicing diligently at opening and closing his hands.  He focuses on his fingers really hard and very purposely practices.   It’s funny to watch him work so hard at it – but all that concentration is starting to pay off.  I left him this morning at daycare with a rattle in his hand and the other evening he had ahold of my shirt/hair.  Soon he will probably be able to for real play with toys and then life will be REALLY interesting.

William has been saying the funniest things.  The other day coming home from school, he was telling us something that sounded like “Garrett come to the house”.  Nothing is ever that clear though, so we tried all variations of Garrett and different people’s houses before I think William finally gave up and just said “ok”.  Haha!  I will say, I’m not necessarily looking forward to setting up playdates.  That just seems like it is going to be a lot of work and I’m sure that William will become best friends with a child whose parents I won’t be able to stand.  Without fail I am sure.   Maybe not.  We will see.  Maybe I have a year or so.  Though, getting invited to birthday parties has already started.  He was just invited to one for a child in the other Transition classroom, who I don’t even know.  I think that’s ridiculous.  I understand not wanting any child to feel left out, especially since they can communicate with each other now, but….um…..I don’t know you.  Your child is not in my child’s direct classroom.  Luckily, we will be heading to Cleveland during the party, so I’ve got an easy out.  Just saying.

Poor little William fell the other morning before school and ran into some picture frames that needed to be rehung, but I haven’t gotten around to it yet.  Of course he would run into them and cut his face.  What we didn’t realize until the next day, was that he had also bit the hell out of his cheek.  We were dropping him off in his classroom, giving him a hug bye, and I caught a glimpse of the inside of his mouth.  It was hugely swollen and was white at the top of the wound.  I thought it was infected it looked so bad.  Sam was able to get a better look at it and thought maybe it was just beat up “cheek meat”.  I called the doctor and they said that there’s nothing that they can really do for it.  When we get home, we look at it again, and it just looks terrible.  Really really awful.  So Sam takes him to acute care, while I play with Patrick and make dinner.  They say basically the same thing, but give a prescription for antibiotics ‘just in case’ it gets infected.  Which was really what we were all so concerned about.  And honestly – somehow the copay for acute care has dropped and is the same as going to his pediatrician – so I might just start taking him there more often.  I was really happy they came home with a Rx in hand – I feel like we pay the copay too often and leave empty handed with the knowledge that there is “nothing they can do”.  Whatever.

Patrick has seemed to have acclimated successfully to daycare and has taken the opportunity to stop sleeping through the night.  We are now up anywhere between two and three times prior to 6am.  We are trying out alternating nights like we did with William.  Though, William only got up once and took a bottle of formula, so it’s not quite the same, but yeah.  It was nice to sleep all hours, but I felt really guilty about not giving the kids boobs, and anytime I go more than a couple hours without feeding him (when he’s home) I feel guilty.  I hate giving him a bottle on the weekend or in the evenings, because I am absolutely terrified that I will lose my milk supply.  Terrified.  But Thursday night was my night to get up and it wasn’t too bad.  It took me a long time to get back to sleep the first time, so I only got an hour between feedings to sleep, but I feel ok.   I just don’t know if this system is going to work.  I feel like the kid should get boobage, even though he’s getting breastmilk in a bottle if Sam feeds him.  But then, I will never get to sleep through the night ever again, because it doesn’t look like he’s hopping on that train anytime soon.  We’ll see.

We are such suckers.  I have declared that we are done with the boys’ Christmas half a dozen times.  That they are not getting any more presents.  And then, something pops up on the classifieds at work that is so cheap that I can’t refuse.  Granted – they are amazing deals and Patrick is going to look oh so cute in all of his new to him clothes.  (I also have total mommy guilt over him not having very much that has only been his…)   It’s silly.  I just have to keep reminding myself that it doesn’t matter how much we spend (which really hasn’t been that much anyhow) that #1 they are too young to remember #2 they don’t really NEED anything and #3 they will know that we love them more than anything regardless of how many presents Santa brings.  I just hate feeling like I can’t give them the world.  Stupid mommy guilt.

Did I mention that William refuses to say “Patrick” with a P – even though he can totally say that sound.  He calls him “Tatrick” and it is THE most adorable thing ever.  We are honestly just happy that he’s calling him by his name and not just saying Baby.  And oh how he does love the baby.  He always wants to hug and kiss and hold and carry Patrick.  Though – he never wants to do any of that when I am trying to take a picture of the two of them.  Of course.  One day.  I really shouldn’t be too disappointed because Patrick has a tendency to go a little bug eyed when the camera gets brought out and flashes.  I can’t blame him.  He has little eyes – I bet the flash IS kinda startling.

William might become a music kind of kid after all.  Or maybe a rockstar.  He was jamming out on his air guitar the other day.  I know I say this a lot - but MOST. ADORABLE. THING. EVER.  Seriously - the kid kills me.  His imagination knows no bounds, which I guess is the point, and it is so much fun hearing what his world looks like every day.  Hilbert has a starring role in most of his made up stories, but sometimes his cars and trains make an appearance.  I'm just happy that he's not a super-analytical kid.... well, yet.  He just goes with it, and goes fast, without looking where he's going.

I forgot to mention that William really enjoyed decorating the bottom 36 inches of the tree.  He did not appreciate it when he would see an ornament through the box, demand it, and it would be a breakable one that he was not allowed to hold.  He did really well though and there was only one casualty, and while it was an ornament I liked - there was no humongo sentimental value to it.  He is even adhering to the rule of "no touching the ornaments once they are on the tree".  Teaching him to stop stepping on the button to make the lights turn on is a different story.  He loves the lights on - but he also loves buttons....  Bad news bears.  I forsee many trips to the corner for "not listening to mommy/daddy".

Loves!

Patrick by Numbers: 3

*Weighs approximately 13 pounds 10 ounces, I’m sure he’s taller but I have no idea how much.

*Solidly in 3-6 month clothes.

*Obsessed with sucking on his hands.  I’m fairly certain he’s close to being able to get his whole hand in there.

*Stopped sleeping through the night as soon as he got used to being at daycare.  We are back to getting up 2-3 times a night.  Yay for us.

*We have upped his bottles at daycare to 4 oz.  We send four, but he usually only eats 3.

*He will be embarrassed about this one day, but he can toot with the best of them.  I’m just glad all the gas isn’t making his tummy hurt.  That would be worse than the smelliest of toots.

*He doesn’t enjoy tummy time but he is really trying to roll over.  I suppose he’s motivated.

*He is still a wonderful baby.  Perfectly happy most of the time.  Loves to be held and loves to smile.

*He is starting coo A LOT.  Quite possibly the most adorable thing ever.  Of course he stops as soon as we break 

out the video camera, so I will just have to really focus on remembering.

*He spent his first night away from home on December 2nd.  I was totally against it but then gave in because a full 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep sounded beautiful.  He did great, though he was mad he didn’t get any boobage.  

*He has rekindled his love for the swing after we turned it to swing front to back instead of side to side.

*He is VERY alert and loves to observe everything.  I swear we have caught him watching Cars with William.  He does have a great seat in the swing.

*Has had a stuffy nose and congestion for about a month now, but we do everything we can (saline, humidifier, aspirator when necessary) and nothing gives.  The doctor won’t do anything until it turns into an ear infection.  I don’t understand; I just hope it magically goes away one day.

*Travels in the car well but inconsistent.  He did GREAT on the way up to Cleveland, but then cried for 2 hours straight on the way back.  His feelings were obviously hurt about something….

*He loves to be in the Moby wrap.  He falls asleep in it 9 out of 10 times.  I don’t mind.  It’s nice to have him all snuggly on me, and it sure does make grocery shopping easier.

*Is no longer taking baby Zantac.  He stopped spitting up as often and as much, generally, and he’s definitely not unhappy about it anymore.  Plus, he hated taking it, I don’t think it was very tasty.  Though he is still pretty good at creating a bunch of laundry for me and him… ha!

*Loves to be tickled.  Especially his cheeks.  We get the best smiles ever doing that.  Love him.

Thanksgiving 2011

Thanksgiving this year was just like last year.  Thursday at the Rumer’s and the weekend at the Kennedy’s.  Instead of giving a lengthy play by play of the week’s events, which were super fun, I’m going to just list off what I’m thankful for.  Hopefully it won’t be boring, but if it is, there is always next week to look forward to… and cute pictures of the babies to distract you....

I am thankful for Patrick’s smiles, William’s hugs, and Sam’s kisses.

I am thankful for parents who taught me how to be a good parent by making me learn the hard lessons the hard way.

I am thankful for ham.  I love ham.  And also Sara’s vegetables.  I had more veggies on my plate this year than ever before, and I cleaned my plate.

I am thankful that the boys’ have grandparents who love them more than I love ham.  And will play until with them until everyone is blue in the face.  Or red from physical exertion.

I am thankful for cute boys in cute matching outfits.  I can’t help myself.

I am thankful for the roof over our heads, even if I’d rather the roof be in a different neighborhood.  Our house is perfectly sized and exactly what is right for our family.

I am thankful for brothers and sisters who can make me laugh and hug my neck.

I am thankful for sleepy well-behaved babies on long trips in the car.

I am thankful for the incessant chatter from a red headed mini-person.  It is adorable, even if it never stops.

I am thankful that Patrick is continuing to nurse and that going back to work hasn't killed the milk.

I am thankful for in-laws who will gladly take the tornado for a couple hours on Sunday to play outside.

I am thankful for my running shoes.

I am thankful for a good job with peeps I love and work I enjoy.

I am thankful for red wine, dark beer and the occasional Diet Dr Pepper.

I am thankful for some of the world's best friends, who love me even when I'm ridiculous.

I am thankful for my (somewhat delusional) husband who still thinks I’m beautiful after making two babies.

Loves.

That's cute.

I can finally squeeze a moment out to post and I have almost no idea what has happened.  I know I use to get this feeling slightly when it was just one, but two - wow.  I am sure that at some point I will get used to it - but that point is not now.  Though, dinner has been ready very close to 6pm the past week, so we are getting better at it obviously.  It helps that Sam is no longer on conference calls all evening.  But we still need to find time to take more pictures - I'm hoping once we get the routine down - we can get back in the groove of 500+ pictures a month.  Because, seriously, the boys are THAT cute.

William really likes to help bake

William is starting to use the "little" words that make sentences make sense.  Like "is" and "the"....  It must be a parent thing - but we think it's the cutest thing ever.  He's also started saying "that's cute" - so we might also want to consider using different adjectives.  It's really funny when he picks some random box at the store and says that it is cute - not even sure what it was - but unless a red box is cute - he was a little off on that one. haha

One of only a couple documented Patrick smiles

He mastered saying 'please', so we moved on to 'thank you'.  We work on one at a time so he doesn't get overwhelmed and he can learn the appropriate times to say the correct word.  Well, he has now mastered thankyou - or "tanks" - so now we are working on "yes m'am, yes sir" and there is nothing more adorable.  It's only been a week or maybe several days at best, so he doesn't no when to say it yet, but if you ask him to - he will repeat it.  Hopefully we will have a very polite and courteous little boy very soon.  

This stinking lawn mower has no bells or whistles but it is the LOUDEST thing - it is on my list to hide it in the attic for a month or two - it grates on my every nerve! haha!!

His teachers take him to visit the baby often during the week - which is so sweet - and I had no idea they would even do that, let alone fairly frequently.  He gets really excited and asks to see "Tatrick".  Ms Neddie loves it.  She is one of the sweetest most geniune people I know and I am so glad that she is now in charge of William's side of school (Twos, Threes, & Pre-K).  She is an absolute joy.  She's the one who insisted that the boys have their school pictures taken together and made it happen, even though it took two trips to have them both happy.  (and the pictures were awesome!!  really need to get them scanned so I can show you!)

sshhhh - we Patrick a Bumbo for Christmas - don't tell him

Patrick is doing great at daycare.  He has his teachers Ms Tonija & Ms Talithia wrapped around his finger.  They've got him on a predictable three hour schedule, though he doesn't sleep as much as he does at home.  Guess he has more to do there - playing with the big kids and all.  And there is nothing like the super humongo smiles I get in the afternoon - always so happy.  Such a sweet little boy.

Patrick has developed a food sensitivity though apparently.  He now reacts to all foods on the "do not eat because your child will scream with gas pains" list.  This was discovered after Ms T called me asking to bring gas drops on Monday because he hurt so much and couldn't settle down to sleep.  So I take my lunch at 10:30, run home, and run to the daycare.  And then I realize that I had broccoli for dinner the night before...  Well, shoot, that's my favorite vegetable.  You know what's also on that list?  Garlic.  Yep.  Everything I cook has garlic in it.  Guess when I realized that one?  After I made Honey Garlic chicken last night - 3 tablespoons of garlic.  So - Patrick got a bottle while I waited 12 hours for the garlic to leave my system.  I made it 10 before my boobs revolted and demanded to be pumped.  We gave him that milk at 4am and I think it was ok.  But ugh.  I should probably spend some time with the "do not eat because your child will scream with gas pains" list to make sure I don't hurt him anymore.  It never ends.

I look over from the kitchen one morning and William started dancing to the song his bulldozer plays

Though, it seems like the reflux might be calming down, but who knows really....  As soon as we say he's spitting up less - he ruins two of my shirts and his sweater - and he hadn't even eaten recently...?!  I wonder when spitting up ends.  Probably as soon as teething begins and then he'll be drooling constantly - come to think of it - he has been drooling a lot in the past couple days... oh no... haha!

I just barely got in there in time to get this one - William wanted to sit and hold Patrick

So - we are headed to B&B's today for Thanksgiving lunch and then tomorrow after I get off work, yep - no vacation days, we are off to Cleveland to see my family.  I am pumped.  I haven't seen everyone in two months I think.  It should be good - I'm excited.  Now if we can just make the trip with both boys sleeping and not having to stop to let one play and the other eat - we will be good.  I'm shooting for leaving at 8:00 to try and make that happen.  Though, I think that there will be three of us asleep at that point.  I'll do my best to stay up to amuse Sam, but that's my bedtime, so it's going to be a struggle.

had to take a picture because dogs on babies' feet are entirely too cute not to document

Loves!

Back to work

On November 1st I went back to work.  It took 2.75 hours to get everything done and everyone out the door, but we did it.  And Sam and I even got to work a little early and there were no tears.  I thought for sure there would be tears, but Patrick has wonderful teachers who I already want to hire away.  Though, I would have to fight my boss for them, his baby girl was in their class as well - she actually just transitioned out which is so sad because she was such a good 'mama' to Patrick...  I digress.  I went back to work.

What I missed the most I found really surprisingly.  I missed breastfeeding the most.  I missed feeding him, being the one that fed him, and holding him close.  So I will retract a portion of my previous stance, and say that breastfeeding is good for bonding.  (I still don't believe that it is the only way...and the ninnie nazis should be nicer...but anyway)  I don't like that I get to feed him at minimum once a day and at max three times and it has to be a really good day to hit three.  But I am counting myself lucky that he is switching between breast and bottle easily.

That being said.  I hate pumping.  Again, I'm lucky because my cube could literally not be a single foot closer to the large private bathroom that houses an armchair and endtable with an outlet, but it's boring and awkward and I don't like it.  I would much rather be feeding my baby instead of stressing out about only producing 3 ounces instead of the 4 I need to put in the bottle.  And I'm constantly second guessing if he needs the four ounces we just started giving him or if the three was enough and now he's being overfed, etc. etc. etc.  All I do is overthink the whole thing and worry that I'm not doing the right thing and I hate pumping.  But it is a means to an end, and the only productive thing I can do, so I less than happily march the 15 feet to the bathroom two to three times a day.  Alls well that ends well I suppose.

Our morning, well my morning atleast, now starts at 5:30am, if not earlier.  I have to get up and pump, I don't mind doing it at home while watching the news though - it's not boring watching the weather four times, and then hurry up and take a shower.  We pray that Patrick sleeps through the whole routine or goes back to sleep if he woke up because it is nearly impossible to get out of the house by 7:15/20 if he is awake.  I don't know what happened - but the swing is no longer magic and both of us are back and forth constantly trying to keep him happy while also trying to iron and dry our hair.  Oh and get William ready and keep him happy.  I find it amusing that with one child we got up at 7:00 and all three of us were out the door thirty minutes later, but with two children, I am awake a good hour and half earlier.  But we are both to work early and the morning seems to work, so I'll take it.

The evenings are slowly getting better.  Though, what seemed so terrible might have been caused by Sam having to work extremely late the past two weeks, so I was on my own most nights.  But I am surprised at how difficult it is to get it all done.  As soon as we get home, Patrick needs to be fed, but dinner also needs to be made.  Dinner has only been on the table once by 6pm and that was tonight and it was a miracle.  So, I think there will be some schedule adjusting.  Hopefully William will adjust with the schedule and not against it. It's not helping that he is VERY two.  But this too shall pass.  I keep telling myself.  Someday he will be six and we will have a whole different set of problems but atleast he won't be two any longer.  haha!

There is literally no time to do anything.  I think this is because I go to bed before 9pm.  I would like to be in bed by 8, but that's not really happening anymore since Patrick wants to have his "midnight" snack around 7:30 and by god, I'm not going to bed the same time as an infant!! ha!!  Thank goodness my husband stays up a little later so sometimes the dishes get done.  But the house seems to stay in a constant disarray and I've only managed to run maybe twice in the past two weeks.  I had no idea that having two would more than triple the work - crazy!!  I don't know how we are ever going to have time to do anything ever again.  I'm sure at some point it will all even out, but right now, it seems impossible.  Atleast Patrick is a happy relaxed joy of a baby.

So funny how I thought we were doing so good at two before I went back to work.  Like it was nothing.  We adjusted easily and things were going smoothly.  I was so naive.  Being home and keeping the house up is easy.  It's not like being a stay at home mom is a piece of cake, but having been both, I think being a working mom is harder.  Both types of moms have household responsibilites, but one has to leave the house, not see the kids all day, and still find time to do the laundry and vacuum in the non-existent free time.  It's a little overwhelming actually.  All I want to do is play with the kids and soak up the baby smiles and William kisses, but I'm constantly reminded of how much work needs to be done.  It's easy to say - go play with the kids, don't worry about the housework, but then you are living in absolute filth, so we've got to figure out to find the balance.

I think I cried a little at some point during the first week, just not the first day, but my first breakdown over the whole thing happened this past weekend.  We really needed to spend some quality time with William without Patrick around, and Sam's mom had been offering to keep Patrick, so it was all set up.  She would take him on Saturday and keep him all day, while we took William to see the Thomas and Friends movie on the big screen (he LOOOVVEDD it by the way and was so well behaved) and give him some well deserved mommy & daddy time.  We wake up Saturday about 6:20, I feed the baby, William gets up, Sam makes breakfast, showers are taken.  I get out of the shower and Patrick wants a snack.  Then instead of continuing with the morning, I have a mini-breakdown because I have nothing to wear.  Nothing fits that is clean and everything else is dirty.  I don't want to look like a slob and wear yoga pants with a tshirt, so I all but refuse to get dressed and ready for breakfast at Chick-fil-a.  Sam and I end up taking separate cars to breakfast.  I did wear yoga pants.  I cling to Patrick all breakfast.  No seriously - I don't know that I even let anyone else look at him - I just let him sleep in my arms and I stared into space trying to avoid what was happening.  Breakfast ends and I have to put him in his seat and move him to Becky's car.  I make it through that, get to my car, and just start crying.  My mini-breakdown earlier was just trying to create an excuse so I wouldn't have to let him go.  That if I could pretend I had nothing to wear and acted just a little crazy, maybe Sam would buy it and I wouldn't have to go to breakfast...

The thing is - I only get two days a week with him.  Two days to feed him, snuggle with him, and make him know how much I love him.  And they had arranged for him to basically be gone from me for a whole day.  I lost it.  I didn't feel like anyone got it.  It was different with William.  I was with him 7 days a week - I wasn't missing anything.  Not a smile, not a play kick, and certainly not a single colicky cry. I feel like I'm missing everything with Patrick and I hate that I'm not home with him (even though it wasn't the plan with William, etc blah etc blah).  I had a breakdown.  Sam made it better by us going to B&B's to watch football by 2:30 - so it was only four hours missed - but I still didn't like it.

So yeah - I've been back at work for 2 weeks.  I like work, so it's not bad, and it's kinda slow this time of year, so it's giving me plenty of opportunity to ease in and remember all the things I pushed to the back of my brain.  I'm sure it gets easier and better and soon it will be routine just like it was when we were just three.  I have a feeling that there was a time when I felt like it was all a little much then too, but then it got better and easier.

**NOTE:  After finishing this up and reflecting for a moment - I think I might come off as a little whiny - and I certainly didn't mean to make it sound like I am unhappy and have nothing good in my life.  I am beyond blessed and the fact that my whiny-ness can be contained to a couple paragraphs is testament enough (atleast to me) that I've got it pretty good.  Just a couple kinks to work out is all.  Just wanted to make that clear.  I am not ungrateful.  (just exhausted - haha!!)

Loves.

Halloween 2011

Forgive me - I am behind in all things blog.  Going back to work is kicking my butt - we have literally NO time to do anything....

I decided a very long time ago that the perk of having more than one kid was dressing them alike and having their Halloween costumes be "themed".  Both of the boys' grandaddies have/are referrees - Grandaddy K coached and reffed soccer and Grandaddy R currently refs football.  Last we decided that William would dress up a referree this year (cutest idea ever) and then when we found out there would be another little boy to dress for Halloween - he would be the football (second cutest idea ever!).  So I bought a sleep sack pattern for 99 cents, some brown and white fleece and his costume was born.  They were adorable.

William was all excited to go trick or treating and could even say the phrase, but he was in a mood that evening and we almost had to cancel the whole thing.  He came around and off we went but without taking pictures of the two of them together.  His mood didn't get THAT good.  And then, once he figured out he got candy and that candy was in his pumpkin, he would just say more and open it and not even really walk up to the house.  I think next year will be the year that he really understands.  Plus, half of our neighborhood wasn't really participating, so he didn't get a whole lot of practice.

We had planned for Bill & Becky to meet us to see their costumes and they ended up walking around the block with us.  William had a big time, thought I'm not sure how Becky did it in her heels... :)  It was nice to have extra pair of hands to keep William in line though.  Patrick was very well behaved and slept through the whole thing.  Sweet sweet boys.

William went to bed on a sugar high.  We couldn't get him to eat anything, not even a hotdog and cheese.  He thoroughly enjoyed all the gummy treats and I appreciated that the neighbors didn't give him a bunch of candy we would just have to take away.  Patrick ate like a champ when we got home and promptly went to bed, while we scrambled for the rest of the evening to make sure we had everything ready for his first day of daycare and my first day of work.

We had a really fun time taking him around and can't wait until next year!!  I've got to start planning their costumes already!!

Loves.