Tuesday, October 12, 2010

What I Miss

I've been at work for one week and two days and it has been an adjustment all around our house.  Poor pepito is probably having the roughest time but Sam says that the full on meltdowns have stopped during the morning drop off at daycare, so that's a good start.  We're hoping by next week he will think that school is fun and not us abandoning him.  We'll see.

So in honor of our (my) new life - this is what I miss from my old life:

1.  Staying in pajamas until lunch....or later...or all day.
2.  Big snuggly hugs from William after nap time.
3.  Baby laughter at 9am.
4.  Watching Dinosaur Train with a lap resident.
5.  Grocery shopping in the morning.
6.  117 phone calls to my bestie daily.
7.  Reading blogs so often that there are no favorites left unclicked.
8.  Sewing.
9.  Random and spontaneous hugs and kisses from the resident mini-person.
10.  Going to the playground in the morning and swinging with William.
11.  Knowing that I COULD go off on vacation at any time.
12.  Having free access, if we went grocery shopping in the morning, to caffeine.
13.  Playing "I'm gonna get you" with pepito.
14.  "MaMa MaMa MaMa"
15.  Feeling like SuperMom and William thinking so too.
16.  Watching William learn new and super fun things in real time.
17.  Being able to put errands off until I wasn't tired and sleepy the next day.
18.  Never having blisters on my feet because I was always either barefoot or in flip flops.
19.  Taking impromptu trips to Chill because William "wanted" some yogurt.
20.  William.
*The list is much longer in my head but it starts to get duplicate-y....just so you know - I absolutely miss more than 20 things of my life home with pepito burrito...

i love him - THE cutest kid on the block

I will say, I have missed being home with William a lot more than I had anticipated.  A LOT MORE.  Part of it might have been that I didn't have a computer at work until the end of the fourth day and felt totally useless, which is something I never felt at home.  I wasn't a peon in my house.  I knew things.  I was super mom.  Atleast, I'd like to think so...

running around the playground - and I MADE his outfit!!

And it's hard to only see him for two - three hours a day MAX.  So I'm very grateful that life hit us hard and I got to stay home for the first 14 months of his life but I don't know that I would say that I would do it again because it's not like we had a choice.  And that's something I really wish more of the people in my life understood.  I didn't choose to stay at home and if I had had the choice, I wouldn't have stayed home.  Financial stability and being able to give William what he deserves when the times come is important to us.  Though I will say that by being forced to stay at home I don't have any guilt about sending him to daycare and going to work, which is nice.  I could give a humongo rant on this topic because it seems to come up so often that people think I made a choice to stay home.  But, Sam wouldn't approve of my soapbox (love ya babe), so I'll stay off it for now.  Just saying is all.

he LOOOVVEESSS the swing

I'll be honest - I don't know how many times I've said in the past week and a half "I miss my old life".  Because I do.  I find myself thinking I can go get diaper creme tomorrow before naptime but I can't - because I'll be at work.  So last night at 8pm I ran to WalMart to get juice, diaper creme, and sinus infection medicine.  Thank goodness I'm still anonymous in this town - I'm sure I was a sight to see!  So, in times like that, I miss it.  I also wish that the day care had a video stream where I could just see that he was doing good and having fun because he plays possum when I come pick him up and pretends like he's upset even though he was having a great time 20 seconds before he saw me.  Oh well.  The time will come when he'll be upset I'm making him leave...

his first day of school - looking handsome

So this post is long overdue and probably way too random and babbly but it's part of what's been on my mind and going on over here in our house.  Next up - what I don't miss about being home.  haha - will probably be a lot more entertaining!!

1 comment:

Social Worker Mama said...

I totally get it. Seriously. I was laid off just 4 weeks after Nora was born and we never made the conscious decision for me to stay home, it just happened that way. Like you, I would have totally been a working mom if that had been in the cards. The lack of control over that part of my life (not being able to work or FIND work was/is very challenging) but I'm more grateful every day that I had over a year home with my babies too. I'm out of the house 4 days a week now and it's a great balance, but I'm sooo ready to graduate and work. :) Best of luck getting settled in at work. Try to remember it takes a while (months even) to get settled into a new routine. You'll find your rhythm at work and little man will come to love daycare. He's at a hard age right now with separation anxiety setting in, but he'll soon be saying "yay!!" when you pull into the parking lot of the daycare. It'll get better!!


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